what if

well,actually this night is a free night for me. haha. i just dont have mood to study. so Im gonna write on you about crappy things,again.

what if..

I have a crush. well,actually we can say him as my ex-crush. I..emm I dont like him like really really like, it's just hmm a girl need someone to make her day lighten,right.haha. it's just my stupid theory. he,well you know him,the BBC.

he's cute.he's smart.he's kind. he totally is a candy  for girls' eyes. yeah, who can deny cute guys.haha. i knew it's impossible for me to be friend or more to him,because we both belong in different life,eventho we live in the same world. to make it worse,he  doesnt even sense my existence,ever. yeah,im alone in this thing. my world only.

and sometimes,I wonder how it would be if it didnt turn up like now. what if he told me the 'inverse' things he had said to me before. like,'yeah,I know you'. or, 'athirah,right?' or, 'I always bumped into you before,of course I remember.'

it would be totes wonderful,and I even barely can sleep  at night because of those simple words from him. haha. as if,..

why am I being a silly girl? eventho he's just my lil crush. I wasnt into him like really really into HIM. well, maybe he was the first public eye candy for me. what? public? explain? hmm,like this.. I never told anybody if I ever got eyes into boys. and,I barely have someone who I think is worth looking at. yeah,Im a jerkass girl. Im loser at it,or you can call me naive.lalalala. so,he's the first one who I told my friend,I like seeing him. thats it.

at 20, and still a naive one. haha,Im a weirdo,right?

sometimes,I feel of wanting to try the romance thing,like you know..coupling thingy thing. I just curious to know what couple talk about when they hanging on phone like hours,like monkey hanging on the tree trunk. what do they talk about when they sit for hours for many times. dont they feel boring? haha. these Q's really showed the naive me.

I dislike messaging,and calling. yeah,I just use my smart phone to snap pictures,twitter,facebook,whatsapp, blablabla. texting fellas and calling fams. other times, sleep,read,movies,music,blog,lepak,makan. itu pon dah rasa macam sarat hari aku.haha.

gee said,sometimes we girls have to search the way in. hmm,this is totes not my thing. haha. can I just go with the flow. I just hate,main mata,layan sana sini,mesej,calling.. can I survive being myself only without changing anything. i dont know. I just feel like going with the flow.

silly athe. yeah.


thats it for the crap post.

ps: friends,please dont comment to this post,that would be a shame for me.haha. just read and get rid of it. haha.

silly girl;
senoritakiwirara